No two light switches are alike like snow flakes but that isn't actually true

The first thing I noticed when we toured our current house was that I was the best looking person at the showing. The second thing I noticed was the lack of matching light switches and electrical outlets. 

I wasn’t bothered by this since we were going to remodel everything anyway. But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized these people wanted to hurt me and my family. This is no Feng Shui house! It's a Shui Feng house!

Get it? I switched the words around. I made Shui go in front of Feng. It's the opposite.

 Every light switch in the house doubles as an outlet. I can't figure out what the purpose of this was.  Yeh, it gives you another outlet to use, but who's going to run a lamp cable up a wall to plug it in?  Maybe it's for the vacuum cleaner? The cleaning person can't spend two seconds moving a chair to plug in a vacuum?

We had a cleaning person that had to move a sofa to find an outlet. Now that's tough! Wouldn't want to clean that house.

None of the outlets match in anyway. I shit on your face not.  This picture is from the basement...another beautiful light-switch/outlet combo surrounded by crappy 1980's fake wood.When I see this it makes me want to go back in time to the moment this person was deciding to buy this outlet cover and say, "That's ugly".

And then we have this outlet / light switch combo. I have no theory about why they did this except clearly a Ouija board told them the future me would hate it. When I was in high school a Ouija told me I would be dead in a year. I did not die. You decide what the truth is. Only you. Only you can start forest fires.

Here is the only light-switch in the house that doesn't have an outlet. They were tired that day.

My mind was not programmed to turn light switches on sideways.This thing drives me to the trail of tears. (You actually have to walk the Trail of Tears. But, in this case, I was driven to it. It's beautiful this time of year. The leaves jump out and say "hello" with their colors).

Here's an outlet in the basement. It's about four feet up the wall. Again..why? Why is there an outlet four feet off the ground? Did the previous family have problems bending over? Rumor has it, the dad didn't have a problem bending over, but what about the rest of the family?

Isn't this cute? No, it isn't. They finally went off the deep end with this flower , vagina outlet cover. I can't tell you the level of disdain I feel each and every morning I walk into my son's room and see this mistake by the lake. (I should say "floor" but it didn't rhyme).

Oh, and here is my favorite. Two outlets side-by-side. At least they match.   Now, I'm pretty smart. I got hundreds of points on my SAT test. But I still have no idea why they did this.

You know what previous home owner? You can buy a power strip for $10 and save the human race from looking at your poor outlet design concepts.  People have lives to live and you do something like this. IT DESTROYS FAMILIES!!!!




Let's catch up before I fall down.

We went on a cruise in December boarding a ship in NYC's harbor. I was too busy to write about it but here is a picture.

Here is a picture of a profession picture being taken on the cruise. We didn't want to buy it and I don't have the energy to crop it to not make it look like I was taking a picture of someone taking a picture of our kids.

Dora was on the cruise but she was a giant in person and her mouth did not move.