Prison Bitch Slapping

Finally, something exciting is happening in my life. A location scout is coming to our house today to look around and see if Orange is The New Black can use our place to film scenes for the next season.

We live close to Kaufman studios where Sesame Street and other shows are/were filmed...like 30 Rock. Lot's of stuff gets filmed around our neighborhood for this reason. I am so blessed.

I have actually never watch Orange is The New Black. I'm thinking this will be my time to get discovered. The director will start filming. I will be there to make sure the house is ok. The star of the show is late. She took to many drugs the night before.




The director realizes my look and personality work perfectly for the show. I film some scenes. I play a guard that gets stuck in the prison overnight. The prisoners make me go through a spanking  machine. Doing nude scenes is not beneath me.

Later I get thrown into the furnace and burn to death. I come back in the dreams of children and start killing them.

 Flash forward. I'm the most popular cast member in the HISTORY of the show. I go from nothing to the best, with no acting training at all because of my white privileged. I rub elbows with all the stars. I AM a star. Thank you . Thank you. Thank you little people.


Will let you'll all know how it goes.